On December 2, 2009, my mother, Margo Kahlke, passed away unexpectedly while recovering from a heart attack that she suffered two weeks earlier.
Photo by G. Kraft ©2009
My mom had been the biggest supporter of my musical endeavors from the very start. She and my dad both made sure that I had the chance to pursue every musical opportunity open to me. When I first started playing saxophone in grade 6, I played a brand new, rented Conn Director Series alto. After a couple of years of playing however, I really wanted to switch to tenor.
While going through my mother’s things at her house, I came across this contract that I drafted in 1977, which I apparently tried to use to persuade her to allow me to switch to tenor.
My mom wouldn’t just provide something for me. She required that I show a level of commitment and responsibility towards whatever I undertook… A type of work ethic if you will, that was instilled in me from a young age.
As I look around my studio and house today, I see much evidence of my mom’s influence over my musical life. The first saxophone my mom and dad ever bought me, the Orsi-stencilled La Monte tenor, hangs in my living room. Many of the horns in my studio, the Selmers that I needed when I first started university, I got with my parent’s help.
This support of my musical endeavors didn’t end with my university studies. Over the past few years my mom would give me money instead of gifts, so that I could use it towards buying the saxophones I wanted. Yes, my mom was the single biggest supporter of my musical endeavors. She will be deeply missed by myself, and by all those that knew her generous spirit.
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. The picture of your Mom is lovely. On the few times I met her she did seem like a lovely, regal lady. No one knows for sure what lies ahead but I hope her spirit is at peace and in a beautiful place.
I’d just like to take a moment and thank everyone who left a comment here, or sent me an email. I do very much appreciate all your kind thoughts and warm wishes.
Yes, this has certainly been a difficult week, and I don’t expect that it will get better anytime soon. However, at some point things will get easier. I do have many tasks ahead over the next few weeks and months.
I take comfort in the fact that when my mom’s time came, it was relatively fast, and relatively pain free. She did not suffer like so many do, nor did she have to endure the indignities that many have to when they are no longer able to care for themselves. For someone who was as independent as my mom was, that would have been hell on earth.
As we go forth into the New Year, I wish each and every one of you the best in health and happiness. 2009 has been a tumultuous year for many I know. Let’s hope that 2010 brings some calm to the waters. I think we can all use it.
My sympathies on your loss. Your mom sounds like a wonderful lady.
And that “contract” is priceless!
Dear Helen
Once again your mom would be proud of the wonderful tribute you have given her. We did not know your mom very well but know that there was a great love between the two of you.
So sad that she is no longer in your life but surely all the memories live on.
We are thinking of you at this time – warm wishes from Mexico
ooxoxoxo
PS: nice handwriting for such a young girl !
I am so very sorry to hear of your loss my long distance friend. I know how much you love your mom. I feel your loss. all my love to you
hugs&kisses too
Diana
Very sorry to hear the news about your mum Helen. It is a great photo of her, and the “contract” is a beautiful reflection of your relationship. I’m remembering the last time I saw the two of you, outside London Drugs and then again a short while later in Starbucks.
Take care,
Deb
Very, very sorry to hear that.
I’m here, if you need a shoulder to e-mail on!
Dearest Helen & Marjorie, I am so very sorry for your loss, it is a sad time when one loses a parent and I doubt we’re ever really prepared. Aren’t they supposed to be around forever?!? The picture above is lovely, Margo looks happy, content & beautiful, of course she does she’s listening to her favourite sax player!! Your letter is hilariously cute and reminds me of the many I wrote to my Dad.
Wishing you both happiness and good times for the Holiday Season, we’ll be thinking of you,
Heather & Jim
Suzy and I send our condolences. Sounds like you make her very happy and sometimes that it the best you can do in life. Be well Helen.
What a sweet tribute. So sorry for your loss.