Saxophone Urn: I Know You’re Just Dying To Get One

This morning I was looking at some stuff on eBay, and I happened to notice something that was a bit, um, how shall I say it, unusual. It was a saxophone urn…

Source: inthelighturns.com

The ad appeared as one of those suggestions that pop up from time to time in some eBay ads. When I clicked on the link I was taken to the website of In The Light Urns™ Cremation Urns, Jewelry and Keepsakes. There I found a form to fill out so that I could order my very own saxophone urn.

Besides having up to four lines of engraving I could fill out—and a choice of wide fancy or tall script—I was also informed that the urn volume was 250 cubic inches. Now I don’t how much space cremated human remains take up, so I was relieved to read further on down the page that it was indeed a “full sized urn”.

The company describes the urn as follows:

Description:

The Saxophone Wood Urn is a beautiful handmade poplar wood urn, part of the Forever Music Urn© Series of urns, and made in the USA. This miniature saxophone instrument is made with attention to the smallest detail and has a golden brass finish.

Size & Measurements:

The Saxophone Wood Urn measures 9″ x 9″ x 4″ is bottom loading and is a full sized urn.

Engraving Details:

Each urn has a choice of two laser engraving styles, choose either Tall Script or Wide Fancy which are finished with a gold fill for a sharp elegant contrast. Here is an example of what we can engrave:

In Loving Memory
Thomas “Tommy” Smith
April 23, 1945 – June 13, 2014
Beloved Husband, Father & Friend

Additional Features:

*Made in the USA
*Exclusive Music Urn Line
*Professionally Laser Engraved

The cost of this saxophone urn is $299.00. This got me thinking: I don’t want an alto saxophone adorning my urn box. Alto is my least favourite saxophone. Could I order this in a tenor, baritone, or bass version?

This got me thinking further, do I have some saxophone paraphernalia box or another that would make an appropriate urn? Mmm… Would cardboard do, or does it have to be wooden?

Then I had a brilliant idea… What about something metal: specifically a saxophone.

How to make your own real saxophone urn

1. Take a saxophone and have all the keys soldered shut.
2. Seal the bell off with a piece of metal as well.
3. Place the ashes into the hollow tube.
4. Solder the neck on, and seal the neck opening off with a piece of metal.
5. Then just place the urn/horn in a sax stand and you’re all done.
6. Optional: decorate the saxophone urn with festive lights and you’ll still be part of holidays even after you’re gone.

Disclaimer: This decoration is not a saxophone urn, rather just a wall decoration with festive Christmas lights. This 2003 holiday decor from our home in Fredericton, NB, is however, what inspired my idea for a real saxophone urn.

I don’t know how many cubic inches are available in the bores of alto, tenor, or baritone saxophones, but I bet that human remains could easily be contained in at least a tenor. Perhaps an alto could even hold a small adult. Most alto players also play soprano, so a person could have their ashes divided into two saxophones: an alto and soprano. Hey, it’s just a suggestion.

Maybe there is a use for all those horns on eBay yet: saxophone urns! Then they could actually be turned into something useful… Hey, I’m just saying… 🙂